You are the presentation

“ Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after,” Henry David Thoreau.

I came across this Henry David Thoreau quote and began reflecting on my love of the outdoors and my life.  Especially given I have crossed the 40 year mark in life and everything has changed.  Time can have this way of flipping your world upside down. I mean here I am soon to be a divorced father battling depression and anxiety who is using his passions for the outdoors and mindfulness meditation to survive.  There are many days I spend on the boat fishing rod in my hand going through the process of fishing, and asking myself do I even know what I’m fishing for?  The mindful response I come up with is for the escape.  To simply get a break from those challenges brought on by living with my depression, anxiety, and life in general.  

Let’s peel back the layers of that response.  To really be out fishing isn’t all about the sweetest and newest in sonars to find the fish. While yes that helps to remove the guesswork I however offer up the escape I find.  You’re looking through two different lenses at the same time.  You are playing the role of prey, while thinking like the predator.  Now I’m not saying this is going to bring fish to the boat every time.  What I’m saying is that when you dial into this frame of mind you reach a connection on such a deep level it’s healing for the soul.a

Now there are a million metaphors that can also apply to how my life works nowadays.  Anywhere from something simple like a trip to the store triggering a world shaking panic attack.  At a snap of a finger I am standing there in the same place as the prey on the end of your fishing hook.  Where everything becomes out of my control and it really looks and feels like the world is just trying to eat me. Then on the other side of that when I have a small personal win.  I become the predator looking for my next meal.  Now both sides of this coin come and go and through hours of meditation, learning, and growth I’m finding that plato.

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